Snice Day

I woke up this morning at 5am to the tinkling of ice pellets outside. Though I'm notoriously not a morning person, I was coherent enough to reach for my phone and investigate school closings. No school. No work. I fell back asleep dreaming of what I'd do with my Snow/Ice Day...

Unfortunately I dreamed that I went into work anyways and got a few things done. That did not happen.

What did happen: I enjoyed a lazy morning. Ate a bagel, made coffee, lounged. At 9:30 it started really snowing and I went for a jog on the treadmill while watching reruns of America's Next Top Model. I ran longer than usual.

After jogging I got the bright idea to finally clean our oven. It's been a while since I've used a self-cleaning oven, and it quickly became apparent that this decision ranked up there with my neighbors' putting snowboobs on their snowman. Bad idea. Despite running all the vents and fans, the house was quickly filled with a smelly eye-burning fog. Bryan suggested that instead of canceling the cleaning, we could just shut ourselves inside the fume-free office and wait it out. Oh, and to complete the plan of course we would have to turn off the heat and open windows to vent the rest of the house. It made sense.

So that's why we have a 2" drift on our windowsill and some accumulating flurries in front of the screen door.

We've been well-entertained in the office though. Bryan is content with his MMO game and SportsCenter, and I have everything I need: a computer, a novel, and a phone with a charger. Add some Mt Dew and Sunchips and it's really not so bad. However, with 30 min left in the 4 hour cleaning cycle, even the office is starting to get cold now. But it will all be worth it when I'm not blasted with smoke the next time I take a pizza out of the oven. Surely...

With our quarantine almost over, I'm looking forward to rewarding my 2.5 miles this morning with some chili mac tonight. And thanks to the past few hours I'm almost halfway through Emma; so altogether it's looking to be a very snice day.

Double Negatives

When walking past the deli at Walmart today I overheard the lady restocking fresh corn dogs complain to her coworker holding a giant bowl of coleslaw, "This job is so stressful! I don't know how else I'm not gonna deal with it anymore!"

About a half hour later, the guy at the register numbly asked how I was doing, so I replied positively and returned the question. "Sometimes this job is the most annoying thing ever." This made me laugh. I told him that most jobs probably have that tendency, but they all have their upsides, too. "Yeah, like getting paid!"

I'm happy to have a job, but sometimes it can be stressful and annoying. However, after today's grocery shopping I have a new perspective. Jobs do not inherently come with stress or annoyances. People who do the jobs bring their own stress and annoyances. So your workplace is exactly as __________ as you let it be.

Sleeting Outside and in My Head

I am resigned to the fact that I will have five girls. Mostly because I want the experience of raising both a son AND a daughter, and I doubt I'll be that lucky. Although I'm pessimistic about my chances to score both female and male offspring, I do think it's really cool in this age of knowledge, technology, and custom-anything that we still cannot choose the gender of our children. You get what the Lord gives you!

Bryan doesn't understand watching the same girly movies again and again. Sometimes I wish my college roommates still lived with me so we could giggle over the Mormon Pride & Prejudice late at night. At least my future five daughters will watch chick flicks with me.

I like that Gwyneth Paltrow has a long neck and makes it look good. I have a long neck too, but I blame mine on the neck-brace I had to wear after being in a car wreck in 6th grade. I'm pretty sure it stretched it out.

I am so glad I went to public schools instead of a private or home school. I'm convinced I'd be completely dysfunctional outside my church and home were it not for the secular exposure provided by public schools. For this reason I kinda feel sorry for home school kids. Then I remember the crazy scholarships they get for being so smart and my pity is gone. Why is dysfunctional spelled with a y? I suppose its spelling should be a little off.

I'm watching the old Emma now (which explains some previous statements). "I love John! ... I hate John!" The last bit of this movie absolutely transfixes me. "Marry me, my wonderful, darling friend!" Excuse me while I go give Bryan a kiss...

I assume nobody really cares to read this blog post. I figure you must be very bored to have read this far, and you must be glad for the reminder of why you don't share your own pointless thoughts with others. But I like writing. Not that I'm very good at prose, but I really can't stay away from it for too long. One of my favorite things at work is to compose emails.

I've been thinking about pulling out my old journals and blogging the quotes of my fourteen-year-old self. I'm convinced they would be very entertaining and almost equally embarrassing. But perhaps the distance of 12 years is enough to make me laugh instead of cringe. We'll see.

Surely I'm not the only one who thinks it's weird when couples say they're "trying to get pregnant". That phrase makes me uncomfortable. As it should.

And this is one reason (among others) why I have a strict personal policy against facebook friending people I work with. My blog posts link to my facebook Notes. This nonsense is not the kind of thing you want your coworkers reading. Hopefully none of them Googled me and found my blogspot and are reading this right now. If so... grrr. Not cool.

One Week Later

Well I don't want to leave you hanging after that last post. You'll be happy to know I've gotten better about bringing my brain home from work. The environment and coworkers are great, it's just the busy workload that is difficult to get used to. (I hate ending that sentence with a preposition, but I just don't have the energy to reword it.)

#1 question everyone wants to ask a new hire: "So what kind of music do you listen to?"

Sara v. The Man

I started my new job today. If the rest of these sentences are short and lack proper grammar/punctuation it's just because my brain is simply overloaded. If I could sum up the first day in one word: overwhelming. I suppose that's the same for anybody starting a new job though. Except for those statues of liberty that wave at cars during tax season. I bet they can still use their brain after their first day of work. Not me. My head is not my own right now. I left it in a black leather office chair facing a wall.

But I'm realistic. I can handle this, and things will get easier every day. I've just got to remember to bring my brain home with me tomorrow.

Mmmm!

I love popcorn! Oh yes I do—especially the lightly buttered variety! Mmm! I just now put an Orville bag in the microwave and thought how lucky I am to work from home and make popcorn for lunch! When I worked at DS I had popcorn for lunch a few brave times, but there was always the chance that one kernel would burn and fill the entire building with that distinct burnt popcorn smell. And even if I was lucky enough not to burn any kernels in the finnicky office microwaves, it would still fill the entire building with that distinct (non-burnt) popcorn smell. Either way, I always tried to sneak out of the breakroom with my bag of buttery popped goodness before anyone could identify me as the culprit. Then I would quickly scarf it down at my desk, making sure the only evidence left behind was my exquisitely satisified countenance.

So while there are many nice things about working from home as a freelance designer, one of the best is being able to have popcorn for lunch without annoying your coworkers!

Right now I'm working on two things, a logo for a small make-up/hair product company, and a set of seven illustrations commissioned by a non-profit organization. Maybe when I'm done I will post an image of the logo and a link to the illustrations!

Xanga: June 6, 2007: Upon Leaving DaySpring

Dear DaySpring,

It's been a long five years together, but I think we're finally moving in different directions. We've come a long way since those early days when I only gave you 12 hrs a week and you only gave me a closet desk and endless keywording. And remember that day when we decided to go steady full-time? You loved me enough to rescue me from the temp agency and give me a few drawers at your place. I'll always remember the special times we had together. That time you took me to the CPS Print Show, the smoked turkey you gave me every Christmas, and the occasional design jobs from Gifts.

But it wasn't all turkeys and print shows. You were so afraid of commitment, it took you three years to offer me a permanent place in your life. You often overlooked me and took me for granted, and I'm pretty sure you tried to poison me with that coffee in the break room. I'll try to only remember all the good things, but I know I'll think of you every time my carpal tunnel flares up.

So this is the end of the road. I know it hurts now, but you'll get on just fine without me, and eventually you'll even forget about me. You can still call me from time to time if you want to give me design jobs, but please don't bring up any non-design work. That part of my life is over, and you need to let me move on.

Fondly,
Sara K.

Xanga: April 24, 2007: Survive the Workplace

How to Survive the Workplace

1. Know that there will always be someone who dresses nicer than you every day. Likewise, there will always be someone who dresses worse. Don't fret over bad hair days or bad outfit days. They happen, and they'll be forgotten.

2. We all fall prey to this one, but do not--I repeat--do not become attached to any writing utensil! They're an unfaithful breed who will walk away from you at the first opportunity. Become attached to them and you'll find yourself saying, "Is that my pen you're using? I used to have one like that; it was my favorite. Did you steal my pen??" uh... awkward.

3. The standard free office coffee generally tastes like dog food. You want to become a part of the secret underground coffee club at work. I guarantee every office has such a club and that they're hiding a beautiful, dark Ethiopian blend somewhere in the building. I'm not making this stuff up. If you suspect you've found a club member, use words like "fair trade", "my espresso maker", and "bur grinder". Complain enough about the break-room coffee and you'll be invited to the club.

4. Join up with one or two people and institute Rude Fridays. On Rude Friday do your best to be cynical and insulting. This works best when the cynicism and insults are obviously in jest. You should also make sure you do it with someone as sweet and soft-spoken as Mel; that makes it extra-funny. It's a great way to relieve stress and makes for very fun Fridays.

Xanga: May 9, 2006: Post-JBU Goals

No more JBU. Here are my new goals to keep myself from becoming brain-dead after college:

• Become an Adobe Certified Expert. The tests for this are really hard, but I'm up for the challenge just to have that title. I think I'll start with the InDesign test.

• Read Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance. Since the dustcover is in my portfolio I should have some thoughtful thing to say about it when I show it to potential employers.

• Cook dinner twice a week. I think it's best to approach this cooking thing slowly.

• Join a Bible study or home cell group with somebody I don't like. It will force me to find some good in them and maybe even help me grow spiritually.

• Read a book about Okinawa/Japan. Ideally this would be done at Barnes & Noble over a cup of Marbled Mocha Macchiato *before* I move there. (Move to Japan, not B & N)

• Train for a 5k. It's been way too long since I've done one of those. Right now I can only run a single puny mile. Anyone want to do this one with me?

• Keep in touch with friends. It's sad, but this has been really hard for me in the past. Kinda like Xanga, I pretend we're still involved, but the reality is I haven't updated since I can't remember when.

• Be on a reality tv show. I don't think this will better me in any way, but it would be nice to have a room redecorated or my ride pimped. American Idol also could be fun. Maybe they'd like me if I did all my performances rolling around on the floor.

• Write a book. This book will either be about graphic design, long-distance relationships, or how stupid, unfair, ridiculous, perverted, and dominating a certain branch of the military is. Right now I'm leaning toward graphic design.

• Sell photos on iStock.com. Freakin' harder than it sounds.

• Convince a lady at work that I'm better than her at everything and I know infinitely more than she does. That would be nice. Maybe then I'd get some r-e-s-p-e-c-t.

• Become ambidextrous, really. I've been working on this one for about a year and a half now. I'm convinced it can be a learned trait.

• Work somewhere other than DS. It's just like Siloam. A great and wonderful place to be, but it sucks you in and eventually you have the urge to get as far away from it as you can.
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