Those P:31 Girls

10 Who can find a virtuous and capable wife?
She is more precious than rubies.
11 Her husband can trust her, --not to cheat at Monopoly
and she will greatly enrich his life.
12 She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life. --Except that one day she accidentally shot a nail gun at his foot which was probably his fault anyway for standing so close...

13 She finds wool and flax
and busily spins it.
14 She is like a merchant’s ship, --wait, is he calling her fat??
bringing her food from afar. --oh...
15 She gets up before dawn to prepare breakfast for her household
and plan the day’s work for her servant girls. --Ahh, so that's the secret. God, if you want me to be a virtuous wife I'm going to need some servant girls, pronto. This is probably why we don't see any mention of the virtuous wife cleaning her house.

16 She goes to inspect a field and buys it;
with her earnings she plants a vineyard. --This girl is big on investments! When was the last time you bought something that could generate more income for you? Does a Mac and Adobe Suite count??
17 She is energetic and strong,
a hard worker. --"Energetic." Proof that the virtuous wife drinks coffee.
18 She makes sure her dealings are profitable;
her lamp burns late into the night. --Cutting coupons, no doubt.

19 Her hands are busy spinning thread,
her fingers twisting fiber. --crafty lady!
20 She extends a helping hand to the poor
and opens her arms to the needy.
21 She has no fear of winter for her household,
for everyone has warm clothes.

22 She makes her own bedspreads. --Note to self: make a bedspread.
She dresses in fine linen and purple gowns. --Proof that God wants me to go shopping and buy pretty things! (It doesn't SAY that she spun & dyed the thread before hand-stitching the gown herself... she could've bought it!)
23 Her husband is well known at the city gates,
where he sits with the other civic leaders. --Is an awesome husband required to be a virtuous wife? I suppose she was first a virtuous girl with many offers of marriage who made a discerning decision. She don't want no scrubs.
24 She makes belted linen garments
and sashes to sell to the merchants. --Obviously a professional in her field. Probably sells on Etsy, too.

25 She is clothed with strength and dignity, --Where has all the dignity gone?
and she laughs without fear of the future. --Laughter required. Worrying banned.
26 When she speaks, her words are wise,
and she gives instructions with kindness. --With kindness, not shouts, rolling eyes, and exasperated sighs.
27 She carefully watches everything in her household
and suffers nothing from laziness. --Which reminds me of a project I need to finish...

28 Her children stand and bless her. --Do nieces/nephews count? Because those Borkert kids think I'm pretty cool.
Her husband praises her: --Bryan, are you getting this??
29 “There are many virtuous and capable women in the world,
but you surpass them all!”

30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; --and plastic surgery looks fake;
but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised.
31 Reward her for all she has done.
Let her deeds publicly declare her praise. --Reward her? Ok, Bryan, I like gift cards, shopping sprees, date nights, flowers, Bliss cupcakes...

Snice Day

I woke up this morning at 5am to the tinkling of ice pellets outside. Though I'm notoriously not a morning person, I was coherent enough to reach for my phone and investigate school closings. No school. No work. I fell back asleep dreaming of what I'd do with my Snow/Ice Day...

Unfortunately I dreamed that I went into work anyways and got a few things done. That did not happen.

What did happen: I enjoyed a lazy morning. Ate a bagel, made coffee, lounged. At 9:30 it started really snowing and I went for a jog on the treadmill while watching reruns of America's Next Top Model. I ran longer than usual.

After jogging I got the bright idea to finally clean our oven. It's been a while since I've used a self-cleaning oven, and it quickly became apparent that this decision ranked up there with my neighbors' putting snowboobs on their snowman. Bad idea. Despite running all the vents and fans, the house was quickly filled with a smelly eye-burning fog. Bryan suggested that instead of canceling the cleaning, we could just shut ourselves inside the fume-free office and wait it out. Oh, and to complete the plan of course we would have to turn off the heat and open windows to vent the rest of the house. It made sense.

So that's why we have a 2" drift on our windowsill and some accumulating flurries in front of the screen door.

We've been well-entertained in the office though. Bryan is content with his MMO game and SportsCenter, and I have everything I need: a computer, a novel, and a phone with a charger. Add some Mt Dew and Sunchips and it's really not so bad. However, with 30 min left in the 4 hour cleaning cycle, even the office is starting to get cold now. But it will all be worth it when I'm not blasted with smoke the next time I take a pizza out of the oven. Surely...

With our quarantine almost over, I'm looking forward to rewarding my 2.5 miles this morning with some chili mac tonight. And thanks to the past few hours I'm almost halfway through Emma; so altogether it's looking to be a very snice day.

Peppermint Latte with an Extra Shot of God

I once heard someone say that God is in everything that makes you happy.

It makes sense that we should find our Creator in all that bring us joy. The Bible says that there is "strength and joy in His dwelling place" (a). So the rush of joy we get from playing with puppies or riding a roller coaster is just a small taste of being in God's presence.

I also like what Nehemiah said to the masses: "Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is sacred to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength." (b) Isn't that great? The people are told to go have a big party with delicious food and special drinks--and THAT is called the joy of the Lord!

It's easy to forget that our Creator is in ALL our joys; not just the ones that happen in church. For me these joys include (but are not limited to):

Sitting on our patio in perfect weather.
Long walks with Bryan. (or anything else with Bryan!)
Doodling pretty little flourishes.
Coffee.
Shopping. (Yes, God is in shopping! Maybe that will be my next blog.)
Making people laugh. (It's not my forte, so I love it when it happens!)
Pastries.
Family get-togethers.

God is in all these things! I wish non-believers could understand this concept of God being the Creator and Inhabitant of joys. It hurts to hear them talk about heaven and hell based on the centuries-old stereotypes. Many non-believers think the Christian heaven is just an eternal, boring church service and that the Christian hell has all the debauchery and edginess they know and love on earth. I pray that they will realize the truth beyond those lies. Our Creator and his dwelling place are the ultimate good time: complete ecstatic joy!

(a) 1 Chron 16:27
(b) Nehemiah 8:10

Summer Drought

I feel a little guilty about Bryan doing more housework than me. It wasn't always this way though, so for now we'll just consider that he's paying me back for our years in NC. When the payback is done I may have to pick up another chore or two.

I need a designer friend that I can meet with to describe my bad days at work. They would understand and commiserate much better than my mechanically-engineered husband.

Neck ties are for guppies and lawyers, unless you're getting married or buried.

It's funny to see the people that some people end up marrying.

Twitter is tired. Perhaps even expired. I don't understand why people still like it.

Wow, I can feel this Excedrin Migraine starting to kick in. This is the first time I've used it. It's like someone just poured iced coffee directly in my skull.

Bryan and I agreed that our first son's middle name should be Awesome.

I took one of those personality tests this week. It said I was "Situated at the intersection of the strong creative thinker and the practical executor...". Well done, personality test. Well done.

We adopted a blender this week. It has fluted glass, an ocher base, and tall beige buttons. I'm sure it was a great wedding gift to somebody in 1975.

Seven Dollar Saturday

This morning I was wide awake at 6:30am. NOT a good way to start the only day of the week that you get to sleep in.

UNlessss... there are 46 yard sales in your area! So I made some coffee, kissed my sleeping husband, and went out armed with the $7 left over from yesterday's X-Men matinee. (Why do so many theaters still only accept cash???)

I didn't go to all 46 yard sales—it's PCS season which means lots of Marines are changing duty stations and wanting to sell their stuff before the move—I only went to six. Is that a lot? Well I didn't buy anything at the first two, but in the following four I offered, haggled, and conceded all $7 on the following ten items: a shirt from Maurices, a shirt from Express, khakis from Abercrombie, USMC travel mug, Starbucks mug, trendy necklace, cute picture frame, cushy keyboard wrist pad, a new dog toy for Avee, and a pool stick (with case & chalk). Can we say SCORE??!! Yeah, I totally pwned those yard sales this morning. Kinda makes it worth having a 6:30 internal alarm.

This is completely unrelated to everything you just read, but I have to mention something that Bryan just said to me as he was watching the Kentucky derby pre-show: "I have a feeling that if we lived anywhere near Kentucky you'd want to go to the derby just so you could get dressed up and wear a big hat." :) My husband knows me so well!

Coffee Shop Blogging

Today is my day off Flora duty, so I am here enjoying a 12oz cup of joe and an almond croissant. According to my punch card, this is my eighth coffee here so my next one is free. I have about a week and a half to redeem my free coffee before I begin my journey back to the North Carolina coast. I am so SO excited about moving back! This morning I called the housing office on base and found out that we've moved up on the wait list from #34 two weeks ago to #22 today. Once I'm there it won't be exciting at all because I'll still have a few weeks to wait before Bryan arrives. Those last few weeks will be comprised of the longest days of my life. I wouldn't wish a prolonged separation on any married couple, but the homecoming is so exquisitely exciting that I wish everyone could know the joys of it.

Last weekend my college friends and I had a little reunion in Denver, Colorado. You girls are great! Driving several hours through flat and boring Kansas was slightly redeemed by the ginormous white windmills, fields of sunflowers, and signs for the world's largest prairie dog. Our trip was highlighted by an interrogation of Hannah's new boyfriend, pedicures by a woman who took two dozen pictures of us with my camera, three goofy girls sharing a small fitting room in Macy's, Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants 2, and... well, you really don't need to know about the best parts. ;)

Blogging, Writes, and KC Life

There are other ways of reading my blog besides coming to this website. You can subscribe to the RSS feed at the bottom of the page, or I can add you to a list of people who will get my new posts emailed to them. I know several of you received emails when I updated my Xanga blog, so I thought you might like that option here, too. Just send me your email address and I'll add you to that list.

I just thought of another great name for my blog: Writes of a Military Wife. Too late to change the name though. And after next year I won't have that military angle to my blog anyways. That's right, we only have about a year left with the Marines!

I wish Bryan could share all my Kansas City experiences. He said I should send him photos of everything I do and everywhere I go so he can picture my life here. (too easy pun) So today Flora and I went out with camera in tow and documented the following places that I frequent: two coffee shops within two miles of the house, a drive-through with the best frozen custard ever, the closest post office which happens to be in a strip mall, my new bank that I chose based on its attractive exterior, the convenient Quick Trip that highlights many a weekend with coffee and donuts, and the slightly overpriced hometown grocery store. It's not too exciting, but that's pretty much the extent of everything I do in KC. Eventually I'll have to get a picture of the Apple Store for him because I'm definitely dragging his PC booty into one of those. Maybe I'll call ahead so they can have an intervention prepared.

Eight Months in Iraq=Eight Months in KC

Kansas City. It's frigid. Avee and I do not like the cold. But I really enjoy living with my sister. I'd like it even better if Bryan were living here with me. Then it'd be like that cheesy spin-off of the Brady Bunch when Marcia and Jan lived in a house together with their husbands. But a sit-com life would be much better than a war-movie/Odyssey life. The role of Penelope is way overrated. More than anything though I'm really enjoying being just five minutes away from a Quick Trip. I get coffee there a few times a week. In the evenings we all watch American Idol or the latest season on dvd that my sister brought from the library (right now we have McGyver, Saved by the Bell, and Home Improvement). And on very special nights we all play Scrabble and drink Hard Mike's. Well, it really doesn't take a very special night to break out the Hard Mikes. I haven't done much shopping. Hopefully Stef and I will go to the plaza this weekend. I've been to their church twice, and I know I should be totally immersed in a ministry by now, but I'm not. I have no good excuse for that. I'm quite the sourpuss at church b/c it makes me miss Bryan a lot more. Maybe I'll volunteer for the nursery sometime. Kids are a lot easier to befriend than grown-ups.

Xanga: June 6, 2007: Upon Leaving DaySpring

Dear DaySpring,

It's been a long five years together, but I think we're finally moving in different directions. We've come a long way since those early days when I only gave you 12 hrs a week and you only gave me a closet desk and endless keywording. And remember that day when we decided to go steady full-time? You loved me enough to rescue me from the temp agency and give me a few drawers at your place. I'll always remember the special times we had together. That time you took me to the CPS Print Show, the smoked turkey you gave me every Christmas, and the occasional design jobs from Gifts.

But it wasn't all turkeys and print shows. You were so afraid of commitment, it took you three years to offer me a permanent place in your life. You often overlooked me and took me for granted, and I'm pretty sure you tried to poison me with that coffee in the break room. I'll try to only remember all the good things, but I know I'll think of you every time my carpal tunnel flares up.

So this is the end of the road. I know it hurts now, but you'll get on just fine without me, and eventually you'll even forget about me. You can still call me from time to time if you want to give me design jobs, but please don't bring up any non-design work. That part of my life is over, and you need to let me move on.

Fondly,
Sara K.

Xanga: April 24, 2007: Survive the Workplace

How to Survive the Workplace

1. Know that there will always be someone who dresses nicer than you every day. Likewise, there will always be someone who dresses worse. Don't fret over bad hair days or bad outfit days. They happen, and they'll be forgotten.

2. We all fall prey to this one, but do not--I repeat--do not become attached to any writing utensil! They're an unfaithful breed who will walk away from you at the first opportunity. Become attached to them and you'll find yourself saying, "Is that my pen you're using? I used to have one like that; it was my favorite. Did you steal my pen??" uh... awkward.

3. The standard free office coffee generally tastes like dog food. You want to become a part of the secret underground coffee club at work. I guarantee every office has such a club and that they're hiding a beautiful, dark Ethiopian blend somewhere in the building. I'm not making this stuff up. If you suspect you've found a club member, use words like "fair trade", "my espresso maker", and "bur grinder". Complain enough about the break-room coffee and you'll be invited to the club.

4. Join up with one or two people and institute Rude Fridays. On Rude Friday do your best to be cynical and insulting. This works best when the cynicism and insults are obviously in jest. You should also make sure you do it with someone as sweet and soft-spoken as Mel; that makes it extra-funny. It's a great way to relieve stress and makes for very fun Fridays.